Wednesday, August 14, 2013

Why one should not judge another

We as responders are not here to judge another person's life. We are here to provide a comforting touch, a soft smile, and gentle reassurance. The things you say and do may positively affect another's life in ways that you can't even imagine. 

That psych patient you responded to, who family finally after months noticed the cuts on their arms from self-mutilation, that you want to “instruct” on how to properly kill themselves may have gone through hell until you arrived at their side. Imagine that person was raped by someone they trusted, someone who ended up breaking them down so far that the only release they had was to feel pain to make them realize that they are in fact still alive. 

Now, imagine that same patient 5 years down the road. They stopped themselves from self-mutilating with picking up smoking. That person is now strong willed and takes crap from nobody, but their one major fault is that they are now addicted to cigarettes. This person gets pregnant, and all you want to do is make condescending remarks about how horrible of a person they are for smoking while pregnant, all you can think is that they must be the most selfish person in the world. But think about this, the anxiety from this person's attack as a child is suppressed by this new bad habit and quitting causes such severe anxiety that their fetus becomes distressed. Suppose their doctor instructed them to continue smoking as to not further HARM the fetus but to make sure they cut down.

You can't properly pass judgment on a life that you did not live, pain that you did not suffer, or habits you did not form. Your job is to take care of this patient and let them know that everything will be okay. 

Now, suppose this same person is a coworker of yours listening to you bash patients fighting with issues similar to their own, fearing that you will pass the same judgment onto them if you ever found out their past. But this coworker of yours has triumphed over their past and has become something they never saw possible when they were at their lowest point. Think about it. People undoubtedly trust you because you hold a position of someone who is there to "save the day" imagine how horrible it looks on you if you break that trust by acting insensitive.

So you know, I am this hypothetical patient.

1 comment:

  1. Thank you for sharing, I can only hope that the people who find these faults in others can someday take a long look at themselves and those around them. You never know who is hurting, how they cope or why they are hurting.